Luke 11: 5-13 Do Not Bother Me
This morning at 5:00 am, I read an e-mail from a student who was pondering some things at 3:50 am this morning. One of them was a concern that they had become a bother.
“I feel like it is a little self-centered of me to be always contacting you with little problems and things when really so many people in the world are truly suffering; so many people don’t have any faith or family to help them live life. I am not just saying this for the sake of sounding humble, I really mean it. There are so many people in the world who desperately need to be shown the love of Christ, especially through a priest, and it seems to me that I take away from them when I want advice on little things…”
This wonderful person is not suffering from neglect, but from being loved too much. Yes, we can suffer from being loved too much; and not because of an impure heart, but precisely because of a pure, honest, wholesome heart. Why do you care so much? Why do you even bother with me? Why do you want to help me? Why do you love me? The Lord knows why. Love is paid with love. Love has ransomed us from our eternal heartache. How He loves us so! I am not sure if my humble student read today’s Gospel, but if so, they will see the Lord’s answer to their pondering questions. The Lord will always provide the answers to our most inner thoughts, our deepest longings, or empty heart. Love sets no conditions, except for one.
“Suppose one of you has a friend...” What is the glue that bonds or breaks all friendships, the most intimate of relationships? Trust! It makes or breaks a friendship. Trust is the first fruit of honesty. If I cannot be totally honest with myself, then I will never be totally honest with another. If I cannot love myself, then I will never be able to purely love another. All friendships will be held not by a bond but by loose ends, dangling; hanging over a cliff. Honesty produces trust and creates a unity that bears authentic love.
What must I do? “I tell you, ask and you will receive; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you…If you then, who are wicked, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him?”
Come, Holy Spirit, fill the hearts of your people and enkindle in them a fire of your love!
If I have a hard time trusting my family, my friends, my God, then I will always be caught in a catch-22. It takes trust in another to build a trusting relationship. Therefore, I must first trust in the one who never fails me: God. Remember, He is the one who never fails me! If I feel like God has abandoned me, then I am wrong. If I feel like I cannot trust Him, then I am sinning because I am lying. This lie is the gravest of sins because it is the gravest of lies inspired by the prince of lies. How is it possible that the one who lived and died for me is not to be trusted? I will not succumb to his temptation. I cannot. Otherwise my life would fall apart; my world would come to an end, and the universe would be swallowed up by a tiny black hole. In other words, I would become a black hole. Healthy relationships are pure relationships. I must be honest so as not to succumb to the temptations of this world. Honesty will never create a bothersome friendship too hard to carry or too heavy to bear. It will lead to a bond that will never be broken by YOU.
Thank you Father, this is just what I needed to hear today! I know I struggle with trusting God which effects me being honest with and trusting another. I have a fear of rejection and humiliation all my life. I try to be honest with another but something always stops me. I am scared or being rejected or shunned. God has started to work on with me on this. I will spend more time praying and listening to Him so He can lead me to speak the truth without the fear of rejection to another.
ReplyDelete"There are so many people in the world who desperately need to be shown the love of Christ, especially through a priest, and it seems to me that I take away from them when I want advice on little things…”
ReplyDeleteI have felt exactly the same way, especially when I was 'crazy'.
Thank you for taking your own advice and imitating Christ in so many ways.
Thank you for the spiritual messages you give to us every day. I like it very much. You need to build every day in yourself the Trust that you are talking about so then you can be honest, loveing, trustful with others and all of this work is a real battle from day to day that you can reach with a daily prayer facing God.
ReplyDeleteYou are a God send to this parish Father Alfonse, as is Bishop Deshotel, I appreciate both of your homilies that not only reflect the love of Christ but also uphold the magisterium of the Church and that is why I am working on getting this refection in the library so people without computers will have a chance to read it,and benefit from it.I could go on and on about how much I appreciate both you and BIshop Deshotel,however I must get some things ready for tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteI just read a great book that changed my idea of trusting God. The name is "Can God be trusted?" by Fr. Thomas D. Williams. It made me think that some times we assume that God promised something that He didn't, so we get discouraged when things don't come up the way we want, thinking God is not listening to us or worse: that He doesn't care about us! I really recommend you all to read this excellent book. It will give you trust, peace and a better perspective of life.
ReplyDelete“Trust! It makes or breaks a friendship. Trust is the first fruit of honesty…. Honesty produces trust and creates a unity that bears authentic love.”
ReplyDeleteTruth and Honesty; yes I have to agree. What is any friendship without them? Only an illusion. And what’s an illusion? A lie!
I remember overhearing my oldest daughter telling my younger daughter when she was still young, “ No matter what else you do, NEVER LIE TO MOM!” She got the lesson and was trying to pass it along to deaf ears. That child put me through hell doing all kinds of bad things and I have to say the absolute worst were the lies. It got to the point where I didn’t know who she was. It pierced my heart not to know what was real and wasn’t. It killed me to tell her, “from now on, I am going to assume everything you say is a lie”. That really hurt her, especially when she wasn’t lying. Yes, it put distance between us but not more than the lies already had. At least now I was living in reality and she was living with the consequences of her actions.
“I must first trust in the one who never fails me: God. Remember, He is the one who never fails me!”
Trust in God; I confessed not trusting God for years. I wanted so badly to completely trust Him, but I didn’t. He hadn’t lied to me the way she had, but I still couldn’t let go and trust. Yes, there were things that I could have blamed him for, but when I investigated those things, they were always due to the sin of others or my own sin. And because I didn’t trust, my relationship with Him was shallow and superficial.
I have to say that when I finally let go of the fear and trusted Him, it relieved the anxiety, worry, despair, doubt and other ‘feelings’ that controlled my life. I truly never believed I would ever really trust Him, not like I wanted, not really, not completely. How did I do it? GRACE! That’s it, I prayed for that specific grace for years.
Now don’t get me wrong. I had the trust but I had to retrain my brain. The miracle happened but it took a while before I believed it was real. I didn’t trust that I trusted. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust Him; I didn’t trust what I was seeing and feeling. Yes I have trust issues that go back to my infancy and I am working on those and my trust in Him is what is making it possible to heal those wounds that are so deep. And yes, I have gaps where I allow my thoughts to go crazy, when I give them free reign to stomp all over the trust in God that I cherish so much, but those times are getting shorter and farther apart.
I must have had some trust in God to be able to put space between myself and my daughter until she was ready to be honest, believing that He would bring her back and that she would become an honest, trustworthy young woman. And she did. She now demands honesty from herself and others. God is Good! All the Time!